☜☞ Hold on to me and never let me go ☜☞
babybleeditout.blogspot
If I were a boy, Even just for a day
 Id roll out of bed in the morning
 And throw on what I wanted and go
 Standing outside my house

Trying to apologize
 You’re so ugly when you cry
 Please, just cut it out
 [Chorus]
 Don’t tell me you’re sorry cuz you’re not

Baby when I know you’re only sorry you got caught
 But you put on quite a show
 You really had me going

But now it’s time to go
 Curtain’s finally closing

That was quite a show
 Very entertaining
 But it’s over now

Go on and take a bow
 Grab your clothes and get gone
 You better hurry up before the sprinklers come on
 Talkin’ about, girl, I love you, you’re the one
 This just looks like the re-run
 Please, what else is on
 (Chorus)
 And the award for, the best lie goes to you
 For making me believe that you could be
 Faithful to me
 Let's hear your speech ohh
 How about a round of applause
 Standing ovation


♥ PROFILE

Photobucket babyrika
30 oct 1991.
18
ite simei
single bitch

♥ DESIRES

♥ FRIENDS

ain
shasha
jEnNy
vaNN
opicK
yaNis
jOsepH
tAUFIK
SHA
jinx

ARCHIVES;

July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 September 2008 April 2009 May 2009 July 2009 December 2009

♥ CREDITS;

Designer
Photobucket.
Blogger.
Blogskins.
Picture: Hollowland.
Brushes.

Thursday, September 28, 2006
1:49 AM

wellow..mi single agen..hehe..ytd we break up becoz we wan 2 go our separate waes n i tink itz gd 4 uz la..todae went 2 sch hopin tat i wil get my SKL strawberry tat i ordered frm my schmate..sekali he sae sold out..haiz wasted..but nvm la i asked him 2 buy 4 mi marlboro red haha..i haven try marlboro red 4 quite long alr la..haha

ya i noe i muz puase..but wen i haf cigarettes, i couldnt resist it..i dun eat nvm but muz smoke haha..crazi..same case wif my dad..sumtimes i tink bout wat wil happen if i becoma a mother in future..wil my baby b unhealthy becoz of mi smokin..i dunno..but seriuzli i dun wan 2 haf a child..becoz mi as a child iz xo fuckin bad n disrespect my parents, wat if i haf my own children, wouldnt dey b worse dan mi?..haiz juz leave tat aside ferst..tml malay paper..ish hope i can do wel 4 it or at least a b3 la..i dun aim 4 high marks la..but dun tink i can do it..haiz i'll stop here tc bb

ma heart was kidnapped by u

Wednesday, September 27, 2006
5:30 AM

ello guyz..how u guyz doin nw?..stress wif examz huh?..hehe mi haven finish revisin la..haiz..no confidence cn pass..i tink i wil b retained..haha..wateva la..todae sch was normal la..nth much..nid 2 go 4 oral aft sch at 2.30//wat de fuck..i end sch at 12.30 n u expect mi 2 wait 4 2hrs..no wae!..i went home wif sha..washed up everitin den rest until 2pm..she called mi at 2.15 den i went out 2 sch agen..haha..oral was nt difficult..

dere were onli 7 of uz who haven take de oral exam..i was de 2nd last 1 2 take de oral..de examiner was xo nerdy but cheerful la..wen its my turn..i read de fuckin long passage..luckili i dun shutter much juz wen i reached de last paragraph haha..nervous la..de my picture description, she said it was veri gd..yaa gd like shit..den my conversation bout injuries..haha make up a story n tel her..she was impressed by de wae i spoke..she sae it was great n mature..haha as if..den she told mi tat de 2 china gerls did badli 4 de oral examz..haha poor ting..but at least dey put an effort la..

aft tat, wait 4 she 2 finished her oral n we went 2 my house..i stole my dad's cigarettes..haha 7 sticks al2gether..pro rite..den went 2 de void deck, blk 101 n loiter dere n chat..suddenli saw my bro ridin his bicycle..he looked exhausted n dirty..he asked mi 4 money but i onli haf $1 hehe..he oso wan it..juz gif la..haha..we gossipped, chat n recalled our memories tat we spent time 2gether..haha until bout 6, we went home..nth 2 do la..juz a normal dae..bout him, he gt sum stupid history project aft sch la..dunno history project or scandal project?..haiz..wateva la..he dun care bout mi xo i dun care bout him la..ish..wen wil dis b over or improved?..i tink it wil b over soon..haiz..i'll stop here..tc bb

ma heart was kidnapped by u

Tuesday, September 26, 2006
7:28 AM

halo guyz..mi didnt go 2 sch todae..juz feelin dizzy wen i wake up 4 sch..todae haf ebg oral sumore..haha..pro rite..my mom told mi 2 go n visit de doc xo i did la..she forced mi..i hate visitin de doc..those hu noe mi wel noe y i hate visitin de doc..haiz..wen i told him tat i didnt go 2 sch, he juz said ok..he didnt even asked mi y or even ask mi 2 get sum rest..haiz nth at all..i juz dun feel tat he luv mi sincerely..i tink he juz wanna haf a stead 4 fun xo he ask mi 4 stead..haiz

wen i went 2 visit de doc, i told him 2 cal mi..he didnt asked mi whether im feelin beta or nt..he juz tok rubbish n listen de music loudli while talkin 2 mi..wat iz he tryin 2 do..i dun tink he care or even concern bout mi..wat iz impt 2 him iz mit mi n haf fun den go home..im nt a ger tat u cn play wif easili ok..wat iz enuf iz enuf..i noe my limits..guyz reali suckz..sum of u ask mi y dun i juz ask 4 break..i juz nid sum time 2 b sure tat he reali dun appreciate our rlationship..dis alwaes happen wen i stead wif a guy schoolin..n dis iz y i like 2 choose guyz frm ite or at least werkin la..haiz fed up

de nxt guy i wil haf a rlationship muz b my fren hu i trust or knew 4 sum time..i dun wan dis kind of unstable relationship..wastin my fuckin time..soon i wil b single agen n havin fun wif my close frenz like b4..haha..nw wanna concentrate wif my examz aft tat njoy wen hari raya arrive..den nov i'l b goin 2 thailand 4 at least 1 wk..haha njoy life without ani guy or ani bimbo n especialli without luv...fake luv..like wat im havin noe..he haven prove 2 mi tat he luv mi or at least concern bout mi..he juz tink of himself..anw hope i haf a retest 4 my oral..if nt juz 4get it la..i'll stop here..tc bb

ma heart was kidnapped by u

Monday, September 25, 2006
6:32 AM

hey guyz..bout ytd at my fuckin bitchy grandmother ting, my dad gt de wrg info..she invited uz nxt sun nt dis sun..haha paiseh but itz not my dad's fault la..de bitch nv inform uz dat it was postponed..haha..juz onli my single aunt n uncle were at de house..dey dun look down on uz tat much la..juz ok la..haiz wasted la..tout i would get 2 scold sum adult but didnt..haha crazi..

sch was ok la..eventhough i fastin but stil cn fool ard wif my classmates..hehe..crazy..aft sch mit him..waited 4 him wif my fren 4 bout 40mins..alwaes late..haiz..haha but his sch iz far frm mine xo i understand him la..met at de same place n do de same ting..hahaha..until bout 3pluz he wanna go home..xo i sent him 2 de busstop..de stupid bus 57 xo slow..asshole driver..haha..we joke ard while waitin 4 de bus..n he called mi shorty..wat de fuck..u tink u taller dan mi means u r tall ar..xcuse mi, ur ht 4 a guy iz short ok..my height 4 a gerl iz acceptable ok..bluek..im angry wif him..but he try 2 cheer mi up a lot of times..haha poor dadi...

i was stubborn n i dun 4give him..haha..wen de buz com, i juz walked awae..hehe..silly mi..reached home, washed up everiting den go 2 sleep hehe..we tend 2 sleep a lot wen we fast..tired sia..i tout he wil msg mi n sae sori or wat..but wen i woke up 2 break my fast, nt even a single msg or cal frm him..haiz..aft breakin my fast, i dun wan 2 go online becoz of him..but i couldnt resist it, xo i went online la..his nick was he reali wan 2 b alone..i was shocked but i didnt do aniting la..haiz if i continue like dis, i dunno wen wil dis stop..xp i 4give him n 4get wat happen la..i was de 1 dat gif in sia..ish..4get it la..n dis was my ferst guy whose concept iz rudeboi n age 15..haiz..i dun like rudeboi n i dun like 2 stead wif a guy same age as mi..its funi 2 mi..but nvm la..we cannot choose luv onli luv can choose uz..haha..i'll stop here..bb

ma heart was kidnapped by u

Sunday, September 24, 2006
12:21 AM

aloha!..how u guyz doin?..examz comin rite..u guyz revisin nt?..dun fool ard hor, must study! haha..wel mi revisin bit by bit each dae..todae ferst dae of fastin..mi nt feelin hungry la but feelin fuckin bored..n miz him xo much..wonder wat he iz doin nw..shld b feelin bored too la..hehe..my frenz were shocked wen i change my nick 2 babyrikaizzwann..haha..dey tout i stead wif my classmate izwan..de spellin quite de same ma..dey asked mi wat sch, age, concept n alot la..hehe..kpo but concern..haha relakz la..

i noe u guyz sae i find a guy reali fast aft a breakup..but dis iz mi la..if u dun like it den fuck off!..haha..actuali its true la i change guy veri fast, i oso dunno y..if i tink he's de rite 1 den i accept..if he bastard mi den i'll b hurt agen la..relationship wil alwaes b like dis 2 mi unless i find my true luv..but i dunno wen la..

todae juz stay at home..play com, revise, do housewk n lata goin 2 my bitchy grandmother house 2 break my fast..haiz..hate her xo much! n other relatives..those hu i luv al passed awae alr..xo wen i go dere, muz depend on myself n famili onli..dey alwaes look down on my famili becoz my dad iz my grandmother's first child n he married 2 my mom who iz thai..my whole relatives frm my dad side looked down n hate uz..treat uz like pest..but xcuse mi, im nt tat soft smal ger u noe animore..if u made mi fuckin angry, i'll fuck up ur reputation or life...haha..especialli wen i changed frm an obedient ger 2 a nasty ger nw..dey r shocked..haha wateva la..beware eh im comin 2 ur suckin house soon..haha fierce sia..jokin la..i wont find trouble unless dey insult mi..gif no mercy..haha

i gtg n prepare myself nw..i'll update bout my grandmother house tml..stay tuned..haha like tv show..ok la..tc bb

ma heart was kidnapped by u

Saturday, September 23, 2006
1:51 AM

halo guyz!..mi juz come aft meetin 1 of my 'fren'..hehe nw he's nt my fren animore, he's more special dan tat..i guez u noe wat i mean..at 10am, wen 2 sch 4 my club's mentorin program until 12..i study u noe haha..aft tat, went 2 bshan mrt n wait 4 Wann..he called mi n told mi tat he wil b late n he is at tanjong pagar..xo i said ok..while waitin 4 him, i walked ard j8 ferst..aft 20mins or so, he arrived at bshan..xo i went out of j8 n went 2 him

both of uz was findin each other coz dis was our ferst mit..haha..funi sia..we were close 2 each other..haha stupid sak..den i msg him coz i tout he cannot come n sae i wanna go home..den i walked awae frm de mrt..he noticed mi aft readin my msg n chase mi frm behind hehe..playin catchin la..haha

we went 2 blk 105 n loiter dere..we juz tok 2 each other n joke ard..wen i decided 2 sleep n put my head on de table..he did tat too..den he kissed my cheek..mi was surprised but liked it..hahaha..den i put my head on his shoulder..aft awhile i turned behind n looked at 1 van comin into de carpark..wen i turned my head back, he kissed my lips..xo tat was how our romance started la..wat we romance i cannot tell u guyz..hehe secret la..onli mi n Wann noe..rite dear?..hehe..at ard 3 he sound mi 4 stead..hahaha..swit guy..n funi oso..he iz sensitive if i tickle his waist..he wil shutter..haha cute sia..i luf nonstop..i sent him 2 de busstop..on de wae 2 de busstop, i tickle n pull his ear..haha..n oso push him alot of times..he juz push mi back afew time wen he was fed up wif mi..haha mi bad rite..i noe..hehe..

wen de buz arrived, he went 2 sit at de back seat of de bus n make silly face 2 mi while i walked back home..haha..crazi Black PowerRanger..haha..b4 dis was batman, now iz black ranger..lame sia..haha but cute nickname wat..hehe ok i'll stop here..dun 4get 2 tag mi k Wann aft u reach dis..gif mi ur comment..haha tc bb

ma heart was kidnapped by u

Thursday, September 21, 2006
4:21 AM

halo guyz..watz up?..mi feelin ok..nth much happen todae..sch was fine n as usual borin..went home straight aft sch..reached home ard 3 den washed up myself..aft tat, i went 2 sleep..tired la..at ard 5, i was awake by my mom loud voice..my start naggin my bro becoz he lazi 2 go sch n he didnt do ytd hwk..haiz

but wat makes mi angry was my mom..everitime she nags at my bro or dad, she wil nag at mi too..juz to release her anger,,i didnt do anitin wrg todae but she find fault 2 blame mi..wat de fuck..u tink i funfair is it..haiz

ytd i kept changin my blog skin til late mornin..my mom didnt sae anitin ytd..but todae, aft naggin my bro, she nag at mi bout ytd..haiz..dun she eva feel tired aft naggin ppl..i cannot argue back or else she wil b burstin wif anger..argh!..wateva la..wen wil guyz stop botherin mi..i told u guyz tat i dun wan ani more relationships but u stil disturb my life..cn u juz fuck other gals n leave mi alone..gif mi sum peace ok..walao la..everidae gt alot of cals n msgs frm guyz..regret sia givin dem my num..cn u juz gif up on mi n fuck off..i'll stop here tc bb

ma heart was kidnapped by u

Wednesday, September 20, 2006
6:32 AM

elo everi1..todae end sch at 12.30 but went 4 chemistry remedial cls..1plus den go out of sch..sha n mi dunno wher 2 go xo we went 2 de bshan library but b4 dat we went 4 lunch ferst..todae was actuali my mit wif batman..he reali went 2 braddell mrt station like we agreed 2 mit n waited 4 mi..wen i was otw 2 j8, he kept callin n msg mi askin mi wher am i..but i didnt respond..haiz bastard sia mi..i tink by nw he noe y i did dat 2 him..im reali sowi but i haf no choice..dun 4give mi k coz i noe wat its like 2 get bastard..haish

other dan batman., dere's one fuckin sex maniac forcin mi 2 mit him..he's 23 yrs old n he owns a car..xo wat if he owns a car?..as if i gif a fuckin shit bout it..sowi huh i am nt tat type of ger hu sel bodi 4 money..im nt a mother fuckin bitch k!..fuck him la..drove 2 tpayoh n wait 4 mi..he haven even saw mi b4 n juz gt my num, he alr asked mi 4 sex..im nt cheap ok..im easy goin but nt cheap tat u cn fuck mi wif ur shittin cock anitime u wan..idiot sia make mi angry..

aft lunch, wen 4 a smoke behind j8..at least gt sumtin tat cn cool mi down..hehe..den went 2 de library n borrow mly luv story..haha my fav..but cannot read 2 much on de book muz spend more time 4 examz..cey as if i do wat i sae..haha..aft borrowin we juz loiter n 1 void deck at bshan street 13..sha n mi talk bout life..like mature gals sia..haha as if..ytd tok 2 raimi aft de ferst mit wif batman..he made mi luf eventhough im tired n bored wif batman..he's xo cute, adorable n fun 2 b wif..eh, jgn gembang tao..haha..nth much happen 2 dae la..juz 1 usual dae..now im back 2 de single gal hu doesnt haf ani admirer..hehe..i'll stop here tc bb

ma heart was kidnapped by u

Tuesday, September 19, 2006
5:18 AM

hi guyz..wats up?..mi juz come back frm de ferst mit..everitin was ok la..like everi ferst mit i've been thru..nth special la..haiz..i juz dun feel de same aft meetin him..i dunno y..mayb i like him but i dun luv him..or itz becoz i dun feel like havin a new rlationship animore..im confused..i juz dunno wat i wan nw..do i wan 2 continue wif him or leave him..haiz..wat u guyz tink?..ish..im i accept him, n i dun hav de sincere feelin 4 him, it wil hurt him more..but if i dun accept him without a reason, its nt logic at all..

wen wil i stop hurtin or break guyz heart..i noe its like bluffin him dat i luv him but in de end i dun..but i dunno y..i tink u guyz wont understand mi coz i oso dun understand myself..i reali shld nt haf ani relationship b4 coz i dunno hw 2 haf 1 properli..it wil alwaes end up tat i break de guy's heart or he break my heart..wat rubbish iz dis..argh!! fed up la!

2 u batman..if u r readin diz blog, im reali sowi..i noe u wil nt 4give mi..but i understand..i juz hope u understand how i feel..n tel mi wat u tink about diz..n rmb u wil alwaes b in my mind..i'll stop here tc bb

ma heart was kidnapped by u

Monday, September 18, 2006
4:08 AM

wellow guyz..mi juz change blog skin..nice not?..khekhe..todae didnt go 2 sch..coz i havin a bad headache wen i tried 2 wake up 4 sch in de mornin..den i juz find it hard 2 breathe n my lungs hurt..haiz dunno y..but didnt go n c doctor coz my batman save mi..khakha..he cheer mi up n talk 2 mi n made mi luf..hehe al de pain was gone..like magic..haha no la..

wen he go 2 sch i juz sleep n wait 4 him 2 finish sch..suddenli my ppd was too low n i couldnt send animore msgs n receive free incomings..fuck la..how 2 cntct him..but he understand mi..he juz sae dun wori u cn stil cal mi rite dear..hehe swit rite..im over reactin..haha..crazi mi..i gave him sha no. in case he wan 2 inform mi anitin..sha iz alwaes dere in dis kind of situation..haha helpful fren..haiz nth much happen 2dae juz onli cant wait 4 tml ferst mit wif my onli batman..khakha..hope nth goes wrg agen..wish mi gd luck guyz..im nervous rite nw..

but de most imprt dae iz wed..de dae i wil mit him alone..de dae we wil spend time watchin movie, shoppin n take neoprintz 2gether privateli..de ferst memory i haf wif him..de dae he wil propose 2 mi!!!woah..cannot wait sia..hope our 2 b relationship laz long..n seriouzli i dun mind he's an indian..im fine wif indianz..even i get along veri wel wif my indianz frenz in sch..i dun like 2 b racist becoz no matter how much u hate indianz, u wil definiteli c dem in sch or aniwher else..xo y hate dem wen u cn b frenz wif dem..its nt a crime wat havin indian frenz..haiz y muz some of u guyz hate dem..ish2 no gd u noe..haha btw i noe u guyz cant wait 2 c my neoprint wif him rite..hehe i oso cannot wait sia! i wil show u asap.. i'll stop here tc bb

ma heart was kidnapped by u

Sunday, September 17, 2006
2:14 AM

hey guyz..how r u?..mi feelin hapi todae..hehe..ytd wen 2 town at 5plus wif my mum, bro n sha..went 2 cathay n bought my new pencil case..den eat at burger king..dere were lots of cool guyz sia..excitin..haha..my mum saw mi lookin at a few guys at in frnt of de counter..wat de fuck..she insult mi as flirt..haha ya mum i agree im flirtilicious..wateva la..aft tat, went 2 heren n bring my mom ard..den dis guy i chat wif a wks ago, was at town n at heren too..he asked 2 go 2 hmv coz he was dere..xo i bring my mum 2 hmv..he saw mi la but i didnt c him..i onli saw his fren..haha stalker sia..aft tat, walked 2 far east..wen i reached paragon, de stalker was at de bus stop in frnt of lucki plaza..he sae he wanna c mi b4 he board de buz..he sae he noe i didnt c him..but he saw mi n he sae im pretti, cute n chubbi..haha..pretti like shit..

den we walked past dat buz stop, i saw him but dis time he didnt c mi..haha..stupid sia..juz 4get it la..wan 2 spend time at town, den gt dis stalker disturb..get lost la ass..haha..wen we were bout 2 reach far east, my mum complained tat my bro n her are exhausted..dey wan 2 eat at long john n waited 4 sha n mi dere..dey dun wan 2 walk animore..haha serve dem rite..dun wan mi n sha 2 go town alone..wan 2 follow rite den tired..khakha..:p..xo sha n i send my mom n bro at long john n we walked out of far east..we saw a lot of types of guyz..haha but i dun care la..aft tat, my mum quarrelled wif my fuckin dad agen..it was juz 9pm n my dad wan my mum 2 go back immediately..he tink my mom superwoman iz it..wen he wan my mum 2 go home, my mum muz go home straight awae..mad guy..haha btw i tink i found a guy alr..i noe dis indian guy frm ite simei..his name Bala..he's funi n his my batman..khakha..i noe its funi n odd 2 like an indian guy but u nv noe mayb guyz of a diff race frm u, might b de rite one 4 u or at least beta dan de ones in de same race as u..

he asked mi out 4 a date on dis wed aft sch..watch movie n take neoprint at cathay..he oso wil propose 2 mi..he dun wan 2 sound mi stead thru msn, he prefer face 2 face coz itz more romantic..haha..cute n swit guy..oh ya i 4got..bout F i D o..he beg mi 2 patch wif him n he swore 2 god tat he wil nt hurt mi animore..haiz i told him i cannot patch wif him animore..he asked y, is it becoz i dun trust him animore?..i said no, i do trust u n ur feelings towards mi but i gave u a lot of chances but u wasted it al..n now i dun tink i can gif u animore..he was extremeli sad n hurt, i tink he cried badli too..i noe he's hurt but wat he was feelin nw was wat i felt wen he asked 4 break..haiz..but nw concentrate wif my batman n examz la..i tink i wil fail my examz sia..no confidence cn paz..haiz..we wil c de resultz la..rite nw im single but unavailable..reserved 4 Bala..haha xo guyz out dere, FUCK OFF!!..so i'll stop here tc bb

ma heart was kidnapped by u

Friday, September 15, 2006
8:45 PM

hie guyz!..ytd b4 sch ends, it started rainin..sha n mi tout of goin town aft sch but sha suddenly was told 2 served detention 4 2 hrs..wat de fuck sia..den sumore rainin xo we cancel our date haha..my memberz asked mi 2 accomany 4 lunch n chat wif dem at de void deck..but i refused coz im nt hungry n i dun like 2 loiter ard wen its rainin la..dey scare of gettin wet xo i lend dem ma umbrella n i walked under de rain..it was fuckin cold n im shittin wet..haiz sacrifice 4 fren agen..itz ok la

reached home wet xo i went 2 bath but i dun wash ma hair..haha wanna get sick..itz actuali fun bein sick n especialli wen u're in de hospital haha..crazy..aft dat wen 2 sleep until 7plus..xo long sia..6hrs of nap..den i secretly check my hp..3 miz calls frm my x F i D o..7 msgs frm my admires..y cant dis idiot guyz stop botherin mi?..dun dey understand wats de meanin of my hp kana confiscate?..stupid..

actuali i dun wan 2 respond ani of dem but i pity one..tats F i D o..he's havin his n level soon n he said he nid mi 2 do his examz or else he wil definiteli fail..haiz..wat 2 do..i cal him la..he asked bout my life n curfew bla bla bla..he told bout his life..n den he wanted 2 asked mi sumtin..b4 he tel mi, i noe wat iz it..he wan 2 ask mi 4 patch..i haven agree yet..he knew i wont trust him agen but he swear he wil nt break his promiz n ask 4 break animore no matter wat..he onli wan mi 2 b his ger 4eva..how sia guyz?..help mi decide le..

wat it cum 2 patchin up, im alwaes soft hearted n agreed den i regret aft tat..if i patch wif him, sha wil definiteli b mad at mi..coz i promiz her nt 2 cntct F i D o agen..but i wen 2 cal him..she was alr nt hapi wif tat..den if i patch wif him, she wil conferm b angry..haiz..i dunno la sial..i dun wan him 2 fail his examz becoz of mi nt patchin back wif him..but i dun wan 2 lose sha trust if i patch wif him..im fuckin confused..if u tink i stil luv him, i can sae i dun luv him animore becoz he betrayed mi a lot of times but i dun wan him 2 fail..

i noe i sacrificed alot 4 ppl n dun get aniting in return nt even a sence of trustworthy..haiz but if i dun help dem wen i can, den hu else wil help dem?..i dun wan 2 c dem sad becoz i dun help dem..i wil feel guilty..aniwae i tel u guyz agen whether i patch wif him or nt..i'll stop here tc bb

ma heart was kidnapped by u

Thursday, September 14, 2006
5:03 AM

halo guyz..todae 4 sch, ma cls gt 4 periods free haha..form teacher absent..shiok sial..eventhough we gt nth 2 do durin de free periods, i do ma eng assignment bk u noe..haha hardworkin ar..like real..hehe actuali i gt nth 2 do n i dun wish 2 sleep 4 2hrs xo i decided 2 do ma eng assignment bk la..hehe..

but de last period of de dae make mi quite angry..my classmatez saravanan(chicken) n kaijin(big headed) quarrelled..kaijin teased saravanan chicken den tease kaijin back big headed xo dey quarrelled..childish sia..haiz dis iz wat kids nowadaes do haha..de cls was nt veri noisi la juz de two of dem onli..my monitoress shouted at dem 2 stop but dey dun gif a damn n continue quarrellin..she fed up n went up 2 de third flr n croed on front of her cca teacher..wich iz ma cca teacher oso la..she de president of ma club while im juz de vice president..

ma cca teacher asked her wat happened but she juz keep cryin n sae dat she haf problem wif ma cls..she stood dere n ma cca teacher came down 2 our cls..he called mi out 2 talk 2 him..i was shocked becoz i tout i done sumtin wrg or my parents cum 2 sch agen..xo i went out of de cls n tok 2 him..he asked wat happened but i was confused..he sae ma monitoress cried bla bla bla..i juz tel him dat de two guyz quarrelled..he asked mi 2 called dem out..so i did la..

dey tok 2 ma cca teacher 4 alwhile..my teacher told dem 2 go up n apologise 2 ma monitoress n call her 2 cum down..xo dey did as wat he sae..wen dey wen up, ma teacher tok 2 ma cls..he sae our cls shld b lucki 2 haf a gd form teacher who was absent todae n ma cls agreed..he sae we muz b lucki 2 haf a responsible monitoress like his club president..ma cls juz kept quiet wich mean dey disagree..haha wat de fuck..ma teacher asked mi n my club treasurer in frnt of de cls whether wat he sae bout her havin a high sense of respondsibility is correct..both of us juz kept quiet..haha step blur..

aft he tok 2 ma cls he called mi out 2 tok agen..puki sak..wen ur president iz havin a prob u cum n find mi, but wen u r hapi wif her u juz put mi aside..fuck u la..in ur personal discussions wif her, u dun include mi..xo wats de point bein a vice president wen u dunno anitin n u hav 2 carri on ur duties..bastard sia..den he asked mi y wen he sae ma president haf a high sense of respondsibility, ma cls as wel as mi juz kept quiet..i sae i dunno y my cls juz ignored wat u sae, if u wanna noe go n ask dem la..i cannot read or judge dem rite..but 4 mi honestli, in cls she doesnt show 2 de cls tat she iz respondsible 4 de cls..wen she has 2 do sum wrk, she pushes de wrk 2 ma monitor or ma clz treasurer..n juz a small quarrel like juz nw, she cannot handle herself..xo y ma cls haf 2 respect her as a monitoress wen she dun show dem dat she has a rite 2 cntrl dem..my teacher shooked his head..i continued n sae i dunno wat iz ur opinion bout her but 4 mi it might b different..den ma monitoress cum down xo i went back into de cls..

my classmatez al start askin mi question y ma cca teacher call mi out..i xplained 2 dem n dey reacted quickli..sum sae y bother 2 agree tat she's respondsible wen she's nt..sum insulted her..i was shocked 2 noe dat dey dislike her..dey told mi tat ma teacher iz a fuckin bastard..alwaes side her den wen he nid help den find mi..haha..dey care bout mi oso sia..wat a gd fuckin cls haha..

i realized wen i am tryin 2 b mature, ma cca teacher start 2 b childish..cnt he settle dis small matter himself? y muz he include mi in dis kind of matter? al along i've been obedient 2 him wen i noe he dun appreciate as much as his favourite president, until i decided 2 stop botherin bout him n ma club..den he start critisisin mi sayin i've changed bla bla bla..wat de fuck..i dun gif a shit la..juz take awae my rank coz i dun nid it..gd luck k losers..haha tats all dat happen todae..i'll stop here tc bb

ma heart was kidnapped by u

Tuesday, September 12, 2006
5:26 AM

ola guyz..woah todae iz quite special 2 mi..i was in de gd mood de whole dae..i nv felt dis wae 4 xo long since de paz 3 yrs in sec sch..i fooled ard wif my frenz like crazi juz nw in sch..make irritatin songz usin my classmatez namez..khekhe childish sak..but sumtimez bein childish cn make u hapi..y muz i b moody everidae wen i cn try 2 b hapi rite..n y waste time 4 guyz wen u cn spend time wif ur loved onez..nw i start 2 tink tat if i gif myself a chance or opportunity 2 stay hapi n wise, mayb i wont haf 2 b in dis fuckin situation animore..

todae dere's one guy add mi in msn..i accept la..he chat wif mi n wanna noe mi closer..he quite gd lookin la n he's concept iz emopunk..he even sound mi stead haha..ksiao..noe each other 4 onli 2 hrs wan 2 stead..tink i stupid ar..usualli i wil accept 1 but nw no wae!..regret sia..dis kind of guyz r juz desperate bastard n cowards..wakakaka..hope 2 c dem in hell..

haiz..but eventhough i am hapi todae ma heart stil dun feel de sama since ytd..i dunno y..its sumtin tat iz hard 2 xplain..mayb im mizzin sum1 but dunno hu or juz sense sumting i do iz nt rite..argh! confused sial!..sumbodi tel mi wats wrg wif mi..my fren sae i might b mizzin my x..but im sure i 4gotten bout him..but like my bro sae, even if u tink u 4get tat person, u nv realise u stil miz him but u dun wanna show it..but honestly i dun tink tat iz de reason 4 y im feelin dis weird..eee!..plz stop dis la..

nw itz guyz out n happiness in!wakakaka..ya la i noe.wen i sae i wan 2 b sgl lata nt long i haf another guy rite..i noe la wat u guyz tinkin bout mi..but everiting iz up 2 god 2 decide wat..i cannot 2 anitin..ok i'll stop tc bb

ma heart was kidnapped by u

Sunday, September 10, 2006
11:57 PM

aloha guyz..sch juz reopen..i realized i lost ma maths assignment n my report slip..idiot sia..todae in sch my mood was ok but my mind n heart juz dun feel de same..i juz dunno y..nw i dun haf ani guy 2 tink bout but y my mind n heart juz nt normal..i tink im mizzin sum1 but i dunno hu..i noe its silly 2 feel dis wae but honestly im confused..

haiz..nw im fuckin tired of al dis rubbish bout relationshipz n guyz..im hurtin myself n worse hurtin my parentz too..i alwaes helpin my frenz ard mi n my sibling n sacrificin 4 them but y cn i haf de same happiness like dem..my frenz r juz like slitch..dey suck my happiness n leave a scar on mi..nw i realized tat no 1 luv mi truli n honestli helpin mi other dan my parentz..frenz juz show tat dey care 4 u but actuali dey r juz kpo..itz hard 2 get sum1 other dan ur parentz, nid nt b a guy, hu truli care n concern bout u..

y did i choose 2 flirt ard?..y did i trust my frenz?..y did i decide 2 change?..n now y itz damn hard 2 be de old mi agen?..how long muz i suffer like dis?..y god dun help mi?..i alwaes sacrifice 4 ma frenz wen dey r in trouble but y wen im fuckin down nw, nt even 1 try 2 help?..n 4 todae, y i dun feel de same?..am i mizzin ani1?..al dis fuckin questionz iz stuck in my mind everi sec of ma life..n i noe tat de scarz in my heart wil nv heal..ppl sae 1 dae sum1 special wil heal my pain..haha..i dun believe a shit bout tat..dat sum1 doesnt exist in dis world n in my shittin life..i lost hope of findin ani1 hu cn heal ma pain..xo i decided 2 be hurt like dis 4eva..xo guyz dun hope 2 c de old mi agen..i cn nv change back..once im like dis, there's no changin back..im lettin go of hopin 4 my future man, mayb itz beta nt 2 luv n trust ani1..xo u wont b hurt agen..eventhough u wil feel loneli but itz beta tat bein hurt agen..haiz i'l stop here..tc bb

ma heart was kidnapped by u

Saturday, September 09, 2006
7:12 AM

haiz..gt tricked by a guy agen..n guess wat, de guy iz cute eZaL..nw he's nt cute animore, he's juz a bloody fuckin bastard hu betrayed mi agen..y did i trust a guy agen n agen n gt tricked everitime..is diz world juz full of al dis fuckin guyz??..is dere ani guy out dere hu cn b trusted??..ytd at 10am i replied his laz msg n he didnt reply my msgs n ans my call at al..i waited til 1230..n datz more dan 14hrs..wat de fuck..waste my bloody time on him..

i was honestly worried bout him..he told mi he had 2 rushed back 2 werk..aft he didnt respond 2 my msgs n calls, i was worried aniting might happen 2 him..but 2 tink de negative wae, mayb he's tryin 2 avoid mi..haiz..todae i woke up at 9 n de ferst ting i do was call him..he ans n he asked mi 2 wait 4 awhile..xo i waited n suddenly he reject my cal..i was veri mad n cal him back..he didnt ans de fon at all..wat de fuck iz he tryin 2 do..

if he wan 2 avoid mi den tel mi sincerely..i wil nt b angry wif him..or if he reali haf a acceptable reason, den y til nw he dun cntct mi at al..argh!!!tinkin of him jyz makes mi get angry..he promized 2 mit mi todae but he dun cntct mi at all, n i dunno whether he's cumin along or nt..juz tired of waitin 4 him xo i juz go east coast wif my mom, bro n sha..reached dere ard 1.30..we got a seat near de beach n 7/11..aft tat, we ate our lunch b4 rentin de bicycles..we rented de bicycles 4 2hrs at 1.50 n we ride juz 4 half an hr..haha..bodo sak..

my bro wen 2 build sandcastles n played water..my mom, sha n mi chit chat like crazy gers..haha..i tok bout my previous x, my mum tok bout her past relationship n sha juz sat dere n listen like a small kid..haha..we gossipped bout ppl ard us especialli a chi couple behind us..dey romance n change positions continiousli..like filmin a show..haha..like idoits..showin off their capability of romance..haha..assholes..

i gt nth 2 do xo i took pics of myself..sha lazi 2 join mi so i took pics alone..like a mad woman..i tink sha was nt reali in de mood of njoyin herself..i tink she misses a guy hu she love a lot..de guy went 4 ns ytd too..haiz wen wil she 4get dat coward..but it takes time la..i understand her veri wel..anw, my mum too was enthu of takin pics of herself..she wan mi 2 take her pics naturalli..haha model sia..but she was cute n lufin al de time..eventhough i was disappointed bout eZaL..but i had fun n memorable moment wif my loved ones..i didnt had dis kind of fun 4 a long time..wil nv 4get bout todae..wen home at 8plus haha..east coast was xo windy n dark but romantic..if eZaL was dere juz nw, it wil b more fun..but he bastard mi xo juz 4get it..useless guy..

stil upset n angry wif eZaL but had fun la..i'll stop here tc bb..

ma heart was kidnapped by u

Thursday, September 07, 2006
7:21 PM

hey guyz!..gd newz..my mom loosen my curfew by a little bit..a bit onli la at least beta dan nth rite..another gd newz iz i found a new guy..eZaL..he's veri nice, funi, humble n fuckin cute!..khakha..he's peranakan lyke mi 2..he's chi-mly guy..he doesnt hav ani concept..juz a simple guy..i normally go 4 guyz tat haf conceptz but mayb dis tyme i try nt 2 la..khakha..try a new fresh 1..wink..khekhe..

but we r nt steady yet la..coz he haven sound mi yet..mayb he dun dare or he wanna noe mi closer ferst..haf 2 accept his situation..khekhe..but de bad newz iz he lives at jrg but mi at bshan..is lyke west n north chases..khakha..but he sae he wil sacrifice de long journey juz 2 c mi..woah..i was relieved 2 hear tat..he's nice rite..khakha..but cannot alwaes tink tat he's gd..u nv noe u might b tricked agen..haish..guyz iz reali a pain in de ass n in de head..khakha..hav 2 accept tat fact..khekhe..

juz hope he's nt lyke de previous guyz i get..dey reali suckz especialli wen dey try 2 look cool..wakakaka..rubbish guyz..anw, tml iz ma ferst mit wif ezal..he's de ferst guy hu agree 2 mit mi wen ma mom iz comin along..we r goin 2 east coast 4 ridin..becoz of ma curfew, ma mom haf 2 follow..n my idiot bastard little bro..haiz!..but cn mit him enuf liao la..khakha..

to eZaL..im nt mad bout last nite..i was juz kiddin..xo dun b sad..im sowi 2 make u sad..muackz..n plz dun pinch mi wen u mit mi tml..im sensitive wen ppl pinch my chubby chickz..khakha..eZaL fuckin cute..dun b proud aft i praised u xo much..khakha..life seems to b quite ok now la..hope it wil b much beta dan now..i'll stop here..tc bb

ma heart was kidnapped by u

Tuesday, September 05, 2006
7:01 AM

hey guyz!..my curfew now kana tighten siak..al becoz of de incident on fri(01/09/06)..i asked my mom permission 2 go out wif sha..i told her i go bshan j8 n tpayoh central..but i actuali went 2 town..smoke n take crazy pics wif sha near ngee ann city..it was great fun actuali..haha..fun as in both of us went wild like old daes..haiz miz those daes..at 6 plus, my admire(afai) called mi n he wanna mit mi..i agreed becoz i didnt cntct him 4 sum tyme so as a fren i mit him..i went 2 take de train back 2 bshan n he took bus 2 bshan inter..i waited 4 him at bshan bus inter wif sha..aft 5 mins, he arrived..we went 2 a void deck nearby de interchange..afai n i took pics usin sha digital cam..den sha went home..

afai silent his hp xo i silent mine 2..we talked bout life 4 awhile den he started movin his ass nearer 2 mi..so i moved towards him 2..suddenly we were huggin, i dunno how did it happen..den he started tickling mi 4 no reason..he told mi 2 tahan..xo i did n we end up kissin n so on..khakha..u noe wat i mean..khekhe..we were 2gether til we realised it was 10.30 alr..i checked my hp..dere were 34 missed calls..25 were calls frm ma mom, 5 were frm sha n 4 were frm kak qyqah..dey were al tryin 2 get thru mi..dere were oso a few msgs..2 were frm sha..she was mad at mi..she told mi 2 go home asap..my mom was lookin 4 mi ard bshan..my mom went 2 sha's house n asked bout mi..sha said she dunno n she told my mom tat i sent her home..my mom was cryin n she asked sha 2 called kak qyqah, abg fareez, wani n nora..ask dem whether dey noe i've been..den de other msgs were frm abg fareez n kak qyqah..abg fareez was angry n he told mi 2 go home asap too..kak qyqah asked mi 2 called her back n she lied 2 mi tat she ran awae frm home..she asked mi whether i could accompany her at my void deck..but actuali her motive was 2 tricked mi xo i would go 2 my void deck den my mom wil mit mi dere..

afai saw al de msgs n he told mi 2 go home straight awae..i decided 2 send him off but suddenly my mom called mi..afai told mi 2 picked up de fon n tel her tat i otw home..she said she was at j8 findin xo i said i am at de bshan inter..afai n i cross de road..den my mom saw us..xo afai walked de other wae 2 make it as if we dunno each other..but my mom stopped him n asked him whether he noe mi..he said ya n i walked towards dem..my mom nag at him n told him 2 break his relationship wif mi..i noe afai dun wan tat 2 happen..he juz confess his feelin 2 mi wen we were chattin at de void deck..he even take mi as his ger n he wil nv 4get tat dae, 1st of sept..he wan tat 2 b our anniversary..xo i was surprised n juz said ok..haiz..my mom asked him 2 mit my dad but he said he haf 2 go home..xo my mom let him off..

my mom confiscated my hp..wen we reached home, she take my dad's belt n hit mi wif it several times..but luckily my thick jeans safe mi..its doesnt hurt much la..my dad was mad at mi 2..dis was de ferst tyme i gt scoldin frm him..usualli he wil onli nag n i argued back..he told mi 2 decide whether i wan 2 change or nt..if i stil wan freedom, he wil send mi 2 pertapis girls home..but if i choose 2 change by my parents guidance, dey wil gif their full support..i kept quiet..dey told mi 2 tink thru de nite, n tel dem de ans de nxt dae..

de nxt dae, i told dem im sowie n i decided 2 change wif their guidance..dey were relieved..xo de last 3 daes, i stayed at home n do al de housework n watched de tv wif my mom..but todae my frenz asked mi 2 join dem 2 visit de new bshan library..surprisingly, my mom allowed mi 2 join my frenz..i was hapi 2 go out of my house tat was like a prison 2 mi..i went 2 mit sha n nora at de library..aft tat, we went 2 hav our lunch at kfc..aft lunch, nora n her sis went off 2 town while sha n i walked back 2 de library..but sha n i changed our minds, n went 2 a void deck 2 smoke instead..at 4, we went back home..my parents went off 2 tpayoh n my bro went 2 ride bicycle..i was alone at home..freedom n alone at last..eventhough it was 4 awhile..haish..i miz my hp..

i knew i deserved dis..i accept it as a punishment 4 mi..i regretted it a lot..haiz..i dunno wen i wil get my hp back n my little freedom back..hope it wil b soon..haiz..i'll stop here..tc bb

ma heart was kidnapped by u