fik n i iz now over..i hurt him reali deep..im hurt too..i noe itz hard 4 him 2 accept diz but i believe he wil soon..i break wif him becoz i dun wan him 2 share ma probs wen he iz tryin 2 cope wif hiz probs..ma probs r wae 2 heavy 4 him 2 handle..n i noe he's weak too..he's havin a hard time n if he haf 2 wori bout mi, it wil b difficult 4 him..he dun understand mi..he tinks i wont wait 4 him or i wanna stead wif another guy..seriuzli im leavin becoz i wan him 2 walk at de rite path ferst..nt becoz i wanna stead wif another guy..tats another story..

i was shocked n i burst into tears wen i saw him sufferin now..aft i asked 4 break online, he went offline straight n walked out of de cybercafe..he didnt cross de road properli n nearli end hiz life dere..haiz..todae he went 4 hiz elbow surgery..itz totalli ma fault..frm de beginning of our relationship until now de end..i made de wrg choices al along..but ma intention iz 4 de bez of him..i cn understand ppl but i cannot understand maself..im a loser n a bitch..i cried n prayed 4 him everidae..dere's sum1 hu accompani mi everi nite n cheer mi up a bit..i might b hapi or gud 2 u but inside mi is empty..de more i wanna leave diz world, de more im weak..

a few more hours 2 gudbye..i stil dunno de time of ma flight yet..al becoz of ma fuckin n lazi dad..hes a bloody loser..i dun tink de information of ma flight iz stil nt confirm..im sure ma dad noe bout de flight n everitin but he dun wan 2 tel ma mom n i..he wan 2 kip diz until de dae arrived..laz min la..fuck him la..pukimak sak..al ma frenz wanna noe bout de time of ma flight n ma fuckin dad pretends tat he dunno bout it..arghZ..